After writing my true story on obsessive compulsive disorder last year,i found out that it was great and worth sharing what people suffered from yet they didn’t know. But then I discovered that i also have Obsessive compulsive German car-rides disorder.(OCGRD)
I love the sight of German machines my family members,colleagues,friends and even my inner circle know this.Over the decade that we’ve been hitched, i just can’t seem to get over this beasts.My bestie got his quirk too.We all hate the sight of ‘Chinese’vehicles.Which is why, after closely interacting with him,i have diagnosed myself with OCGRD.
Basically,OCGRD is an incurable but manageable rides disorder.Which afflicts both genders.It is characterized by obsessive thoughts and German -Rides behavior such as; continuous checking of DT dobie show rooms to see whether there are any new arrivals of german cars (strictly). Prompted by a congenital fine stuff syndrome.
There is only one way that OCGRD can be managed,one is through savings or if you are lucky enough to be a member of an affluent family like me.Then you got, your dreams valid.
QUIRKS:”Normal”folks got choices on what to ride on and when .And many times,i believe the cravings get the better of the poor patient and at times they puke or even vomit seriously at the sight of any‘Japanese car’.
which are always on the road being driven by the ‘common’lots of ordinary mwananchi.I am known to seductively gaze at german machines,especially the ones’with fine round ‘ass‘like the beamer.
DENIAL:Once you fall in love with a German machine,you will definetly understand better what my experience has been.You normally feel like the whole universe is coming to a stand still.And that is during the crazy Nairobi traffic hour,when i go home from my daily business.I always feel like’Obama’amidst the Toyotas’around the Westlands round about.
When i carefully overlap not to scratch my ‘babe‘and normally every car stops just to give way to him,how sweet.
One evening ,i was thinking of trying ‘sea food’together with my BF(Best amongst friends)and i decided to let him ride alongside my chiwawa *Bo to Tratoria.
So i load my babe with the usual stuff and we are good to go.He comes right inside on the front left and makes sure his seat belt is in place,same to me.I start my beamer and fix my eyes to the windscreen .Changing the music from ‘Bongo to Monday Blues'(our favourite genre).
The gears are automatic so we even hold hands while i spin with my right hand in a very steady motion .I reach my hand for some refreshment just When we are at the Uhuru highway and bestie stares at me.
The journey is becoming more interesting as we enjoy every bit of the ride.But then looking outside i see people talking about the ‘German machine’being driven by a beautiful young lady.
When i look at my besties’eyes the expression on his face says it all,as he swears:”Oh my God ,Lynn i feel like proposing to you already”.I say No,but he insists(in a joking manner).And now that’s OCGRD-related denial.
SELECTIVE AMNESIA:After our long conversation and my ‘treat’at the restaurant about how i got my german machine,which came alongside hefty importation cost.
On that Same day my bestie wanted a German machine better than mine though,i couldn’t hide my joy as i screamed and hugged him so tightly as though i had seen a caterpillar.I was happy for him because our German family was growing bigger With finer ‘babies‘.
We organised on the day to order and bring the baby home.This was going to take like two months.But a person with OCGRD does not forget about a german machine until he/she gets one for themselves and normally they develops selective Amnesia.
And we both learnt that,the very same day bastie talked about getting himself a German machine.His OCGR got the better of him,and he kept on checking on his laptop the numerous colours and models they came in.Going back home,we stopped at DT dobie,he saw exactly what he wanted,though one with a different shade,he looked at me a bit disappointed but happy.
I stared back,held his hand as if I wanted to say something but then i did’nt.A young man looked at us from a distance and followed us.He was kind enough to take us through the whole basement.
Honestly i felt awesome deep inside.We both talked to the manager like for an hour ,later bestie exchanged contacts and the final deal had been sealed!
We got back into my German ‘babe’,and that is how i found out that we both had finer”stuff syndrome”.